


The truth is too simple

by Ye_Olde_Hedgehog



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, M/M, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2019-12-26 13:48:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18283544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ye_Olde_Hedgehog/pseuds/Ye_Olde_Hedgehog
Summary: There's a play. At Nissen. Now, what are the odds that Mikael is having an ulterior motive for dragging Even to see it?As usual - no smut, too many ellipses, not enough plot. My apologies...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is 100 percent koedder-du's fault. I was telling her about seeing Nyanser of gris and suddenly having Tarjei standing on the desk in front of me, dancing (well, I say dancing...) - and she pointed out that there probably was a fanfiction in that. So... here it is...
> 
> This one is for you, K =)
> 
> Not beta read btw. So I'm including some commas to be used where needed, you're welcome.
> 
> ,,,,,,,,,,,,,

“Why am I here again?” Even asked. For the fifth time. Not that he was counting.

Mikael sighed. For the fourth time. (And yes, he _was_ counting.)

“I could have asked anyone of the guys, but _noooo_ , I wanted to spend some quality time with my best friend, you ungrateful grump,” he complained.

“Right, and it has nothing to do with the fact that Yousef is on a date with Sana, Mutta is in Bergen, Adam has tickets for Karpe and Elias… what _is_ Elias’s excuse, by the way?”

“Elias has already seen it. He’s the one who recommended it in the first place.”

“ _Elias_ did? _Our_ Elias? Are you telling me that Elias Bakkoush, the same guy that called The Fast and the Furious a ‘cinematic masterpiece’, recommended a _play_?”

“Oh yes. I’d even say he was rather insistent...”

Mikael’s smile was bordering on angelic and Even narrowed his eyes.

“What’s with the uncharacteristic perkiness?”

“Oh, nothing, just… looking forward to the play?” Mikael offered, looking like butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth, not calming Even’s suspicions in the least. “Apparently one of Sana’s best friends is in it and he’s very good.”

“Wait, is this some kind of school play? Is that why we’re at Nissen? Why, Mikael? _Whyyy?_ ”

“It’s not a school play, they’re an established theatre group, actually. Sana just happens to be friends with an actor, because apparently actors are allowed to have friends these days. Shocking concept, I know.”

Their conversation was interrupted by a woman calling for attention and giving the group a quick rundown of how the night was supposed to work.

“Well, it definitely feels like a school play,” Even muttered to Mikael as they followed her and the rest of the theatre goers through a door and up a worn stone staircase.

“It’s a play set in a school. There’s a difference.”

“Hm.”

 

*****

 

The woman stopped outside a classroom and told them to wait there.

“Gee, and here I thought my highschool days were over,” Even sulked, shooting Mikael an unimpressed look.

“Well, you _were_ going to transfer to Nissen, so… just think of this as a chance to experience what you missed out on.”

Even opened his mouth to answer, but Mikael made a shushing gesture as the PA system came to life, giving them the backstory to the play they were about to see. Even shot him another unimpressed look but shushed obediently.

As the PA system quietened, a blond, athletic looking guy came moping down the corridor.

“Nugatti! Hey! Nugatti!”

Everyone - except for the first blond, who’d already disappeared into the classroom - turned to look at the second person. Even let out an embarrassingly loud gasp before ramming an elbow into the unsuspecting Mikael’s ribs, resulting in a quite satisfying ’oomph’.

”I hate you,” he hissed quietly, the only answer a muffled giggle.

”You’re welcome.”

 

*****

 

_Right_ , so… Even hadn’t talked _that_ much about the mysterious guy from last month’s Westerdal party, had he? Of course the guy might have come up in casual conversation, but... just in passing, really? Just… whenever Even happened to think of him? Which... might have been quite often, come to think of it. But hey, Party Boy had been the prettiest guy he’d seen in a long while, and Even had been quite upset that the guy had left the party before he’d managed to execute some kind of grand introduction. He’d had several ideas just rearing to go - and then Party Boy went and pulled a Cinderella without even having the good grace to leave a glass slipper behind. And now… well, Even had no idea how his friends had managed to track Party Boy down, but he intended to ogle the hell out of him for the upcoming… upcoming…

“How long is the play?” he whispered to Mikael, aiming for casual. The small cackle he got in return told him he hadn’t come anywhere close.

“‘bout an hour and a half.”

Right, so… for the upcoming hour and a half there was to be ogling. Loads and loads of ogling. And possibly drooling. Well, Even didn’t make the rules, okay?

 

*****

 

The second the usher opened the door to let the audience in, Even made a dash for the first row of desks. Well, he was the very model of a perfect student after all, always paying attention and eager to learn. He _deserved_ that front seat.

“As impressed as I am by the way you elbowed your way through the crowd - and yes, I am _very_ impressed, by the way - you do realise the actors will be spread out in the audience, right?” Mikael pointed out as he shuffled into the seat next to Even’s.

What? No, Even _hadn’t_ realised that. Turning around he could see Party Bo… _oh, for fuck’s sake!!_ He grabbed the small programme to look for a name. Right. Turning around he could see _Isak_ sitting a few rows back. Ah, well, he had spent a lot of his time at Bakka with his back to the whiteboard, more interested in chatting to the people behind him than listening to the teachers, so this small detail shouldn’t prove too much of an obstacle oglewise.

As they settled into their seats, the teacher started taking the register. The play used the audience members’ actual names for authenticity, so with Even’s focus still mostly on Isak, Mikael had to pinch him twice before he chimed in with a distracted “here” when his name was called. The register continued until ’Pernilla’ was called and the play suddenly took off, forcing Even to focus on a very irate girl arguing with the teacher. Although since the actress _was_ in the seat in front of Isak, Even decided he could be excused if his attention drifted every now and then.

 

*****

 

So… there… was an actor on his desk? Or, more accurate, there was an _Isak_ on his desk. Now, considering some of the actors had been climbing up and down desks all through the play, this fact shouldn’t be as surprising as it was - but for some reason the play had a dance interlude, and Even was still trying to figure out why. And now there was an Isak on his desk, and… well, if Even was to lift his eyes from Isak’s shoes, he would be staring straight into his groin. So, yeah, _that_ was not how he’d expected his evening to go.

Also, Even was pretty sure those hip thrusts were illegal in at least forty five countries. Or at least they should be. He shifted in his chair, trying to find a position where his clothes weren’t in quite so intimate a contact with his own groin - as it by now was taking a firm interest in the play too. He tilted his head back and hazarded another glance upwards, finding himself looking straight into a pair of very amused green eyes. Oh. Right. Breathe. Breathing was good. Even should probably try to breathe more often. Also smile. And definitely ignore the loud snort coming from Mikael. Anyway...

“Hi.”

Even swallowed.

“Hi,” he mouthed back, trying to ignore an extra enthusiastic hip thrust.

“Enjoying the play?”

_Oh God, yes…_

“Hnngh?”

Yeah, there was no coming back from it now. Even had just proven himself the lamest person in all of Oslo. Possibly all of Norway. In front of a very pretty boy. _And_ in front of Mikael. Which of course meant he wouldn’t be allowed to forget about it either. Like, ever. _Fuck!_

“Well, gotta go. See you around, Even.”

Isak winked at him before jumping down from the table and Even stared after him as Isak and the other two actors formed a small but enthusiastic mosh pit in front of the whiteboard.

“Well, that went better than expected,” Mikael commented, making a halfhearted effort to stifle his giggles. “I was expecting tears. And possibly fainting.”

The music ended before Even could come up with a sufficiently scathing reply.

 

*****

 

The moment the play ended and the actors had left the classroom, Even turned to Mikael with a determined look.

“Okay, spill.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Mikael said with an expression much too innocent to be true.

“I know where you sleep. I even have a key. Are you sure that’s the answer you want to go with?”

“You’re no fun,” Mikael pouted. “Fine. What do you want to know?”

“How. Where. When. And _how_.”

“You realise you said how twice?”

“Don’t care. Start talking.”

“Okay, no more Tarantino movies for you. Anyway, remember last weekend when we were hanging out at Elias? You know, when _someone_ preferred to hang out at Westerdal instead, because ‘I just want a chance to see Pretty Boy again, Mikael. He’s so pretty I want to cry!’”

“I do _not_ sound like that. And neither does Jennifer Aniston, by the way.”

“Yeah, you do. Anyway, imagine my surprise when Pretty Boy was sitting in Elias’s kitchen having tea with Sana.”

“Whaaaat?”

“Yep. According to him, he and Sana are best buds. He’s also gay. And single. I asked. And you’re welcome.”

“And Elias hasn’t told me he knew Pretty B… Isak _why_ , exactly?”

“You do realise he wasn’t at the Westerdal party and had therefore never seen Pretty Boy before?”

Even nodded reluctantly, Mikael made a good point there. Still…

“So. Sana’s best bud, huh?”

“Oh, jeez. You’re going to stalk Elias’s flat twenty-four seven, aren’t you?”

Even smiled beatifically.

“Oh, _yes_.”

 

*****

 

“I have to…” Even gestured at the bathroom and Mikael nodded.

“I’ll just wait outside,” he replied, heading towards the stairs.

 

*****

 

As it turned out, Nissen’s toilets were just as boring as Elvebakken’s. Good to know he hadn’t missed out on any luxuries by staying at Bakka for his last year, then.

As he washed his hands on his way out, someone else exited a cubicle and stepped up to the sink next to his.

“Hi,” Even said politely, glancing up at the mirror to look at the newcomer. He was met with a small, shy smile and quickly averted eyes.

“Um. Hi,” Isak mumbled hesitantly.

Even blinked, scrambling desperately for something to say. Preferably something coherent. And if possible including more than three words.

“Good play. In there, I mean. The play. It was good.”

Even did a mental facepalm. Yeah… nice try, that. A for effort. F for execution, though...

Isak shot him another shy glance via the mirror.

“Thanks, it’s... an important subject.”

“Yeah, I can see that. So… did he do it? Um… ‘Elias’. Did he do it?”

Even quirked his eyebrows quizzically at Isak as he walked over to the dispenser to grab a paper towel. And then another. Looking down at the two towels, he wondered what the hell he was doing - but by now he was committed to the plan and pulled yet another towel out of the dispenser.

“Um. Well, that’s not what’s important, I don’t think?” Isak replied, staring wide eyed as Even did away with the rest of the paper towels. “We’re more trying to start a discussion, you know? That last quote that Harald wrote on the whiteboard, ‘The truth is too simple’? Well, what’s really interesting is all the truths out there, just floating around. Elias’s truth. Pernilla’s truth. Isabel’s truth. Milan’s truth. They’re all true for them, but they are so different from each other that they can’t all be _truly_ true. So how can _we_ know what the true truth is when even the persons it happened to have different truths?”

“Yeah, that’s… um… did you also need a paper towel?”

Even closed his eyes with an impatient headshake. Well, at least Mikael wasn’t there to witness his humiliation this time. Small mercies...

“Um. Thanks? And sorry for that thing in there, I… got a bit carried away,” Isak admitted, looking shamefaced. “It was just… I don’t usually flirt with people during a play, you know. Or at all, really. But I’ve seen you at Sana’s, and I kinda wanted to get to know you, and… yeah, forget it, it was stupid.”

Isak shot him an embarrassed smile before turning towards the door for a strategic exit.

“Wait!” Even barked out, surprising both himself and Isak. “Wait,” he tried again, a bit softer this time. “I mean, I saw you at the Westerdal party last month, and I wanted to get to know you too, and then you disappeared before I got a chance to talk to you, and I’ve been looking for you everywhere, and… and I really didn’t mean to tell you _that_ ,” he rambled, blushing when he realised what he’d just said. “But… do you maybe want to go for a coffee? Now? With me?”

Isak brightened.

“Coffee sounds perfect,” he agreed before pulling a face. “No, wait. I’m supposed to meet Jonas for kebab. Fuck!”

Even thought about Mikael, who was probably getting rather impatient by now.

“Yeah, and I’m supposed to get pizza with Mikael. Well, _that_ sucks!”

“I could probably get out of the kebab thing, though. Jonas is pretty fed up with me and my obsession with this cool James Dean lookalike that Sana’s brother is friends with, so I’m sure he’d be more than happy to ditch me,” Isak mused, a small smirk playing on his lips. “Although I might have to rethink the ‘cool’ part.”

“Hey, I’m cool!” Even huffed, trying to defend himself without much hope to succeed. “And I think Mikael might share Jonas’s fed up-edness, by the way. I might have mentioned this pretty guy I saw at a party enough times for him to get off on mitigating circumstances the day he ends up killing me.”

“So… coffee, then?” Isak asked hopefully.

“Yeah. Coffee.”

 

*****

 

Even could literally _feel_ Mikael’s smugness from ten metres away as he and Isak exited Nissen.

“Not a word,” he muttered to him through clenched teeth. “Hi. Even,” he introduced himself politely to the guy next to Mikael.

“Oh, so _you’re_ Even,” the guy said, shaking his hand.

“What do you mean, ‘I’m Even’?” Even asked, confused.

The guy shrugged awkwardly and looked over at Mikael. Even did the same. Mikael looked away, and Even could have sworn he was whistling.

“No, just that you… look like an Even?”

“Just ignore him,” Isak interrupted, scowling at the guy. “That’s Jonas, best friend and annoying arsehole.”

Jonas glared back at Isak.

“‘m not an arsehole,” he objected.

“So you agree on the annoying part?”

“Nevermind, are we getting kebab or not?”

Isak hesitated, shooting Even a help seeking look.

“Well, we…”

“Wait, you’re getting kebab?” Mikael asked. “Me and Even were getting pizza, but kebab sounds even better. Room for two more?”

Jonas nodded, unfazed.

“Of course, the more the merrier and all that. Bislett’s?”

“Where else?”

Okay then. Even rolled his eyes, replying to Isak silent plea with a deflated shrug. Kebab it was, apparently.

Mikael walked up to Isak and threw an arm around his shoulder, more or less dragging him off towards Briskebyveien.

“So. Isak. What’s your opinion on Baz Luhrmann?” he asked.

“My opinion on who?”

Mikael giggled gleefully.

“Okay, I like him,” he decided, raising his voice so Even would hear.

Even’s grin grew as he took a few quick steps to catch up with the three boys in front of him. Good, because he liked him too.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even is now an avid theatre-goer, but... has he perhaps mentioned the play to his parents one too many times...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I don't know what this is either, but I definitely blame koedder-du for its existence.

 

Mikaela eyed Isak and Even with mild curiosity as they shuffled into the small room housing the production team.

“You two got caught snogging in the bathroom again, didn’t you?”

“Noooo…?” they both denied - rather unconvincingly and very much not looking at each other. There was a long, sheepish silence. “‘It was the library this time,” Even, the first to admit he had a severe problem keeping hands and lips off of Isak, finally mumbled as he tried to look contrite and failing miserably.

“Of course. The library. Much more romantic,” Mikaela nodded before shaking her head in weary resignation. “Congratulations, it’s been just under three weeks and you two are already the most disgusting couple I know.”

Isak snuggled into Even and placed his chin on Even’s chest - a position that forced him to squint cross eyed up at his shiny new boyfriend.

“Did you hear that, we’re a _couple_ ,” he mumbled, sounding pleased.

“Mmhm.” Even managed to bend his neck in a near impossible angle to give Isak a quick kiss. “And the most disgusting one she knows, too, apparently.”

“Yeah. Sounds like us.” Another kiss, this one not quite as quick. “Nauseating, aren’t we?”

“Absolutely revolting,” Even agreed, nudging Isak’s nose with his own. “We should probably be very ashamed of ourselves.”

“Come produce my new play, he said. It will be fun, he said,” Mikaela complained glumly to herself, determinedly ignoring them. ”But not a word of warning about the risk of ending up a minor character in a teen romcom. Oh no, he didn’t say a word about _that_.”

”Hey, who are you calling a teen? _I_ am a sophisticated, mature and very sought after patron here to support the fine arts, I’ll have you know,” Even sniffed, straightening up and feigning a haughty glare.

“Sophisticated? Really?” Mikaela raised her eyebrows in exaggerated disbelief. “You do realise that the ‘fine arts’ you’re here to support has already blabbed about how you forced him to watch The Notebook the other day? And that there were tears?”

“Of course he has.” Even brushed away some of Isak’s curls so he could place an absentminded kiss to his forehead. “But did the ‘fine arts’ also mention that most of those tears were his?”

“No, interestingly enough that small detail seems to have been left out.”

“Weird, isn’t it. And he’s usually so detail oriented too.”

“Oh God, I _know_. Have you ever had to sit through what feels like _hours_ of him trying to explai...”

“Could you two maybe stop bonding over this whole ‘mocking Isak’ thing you’ve got going, please?” Isak interrupted, looking like a particularly disgruntled kitten.

“We’re not _mocking_ you, we’re just… sharing our Isak experiences?” Even offered, expression sincere. Or… well, at least an effort at looking sincere was made.

“Nope. No, _I_ am definitely mocking,” Mikaela protested before taking pity on Isak and changing the subject. “Anyway, Even, since you’re here, could you maybe take some props up to 402? Because apparently I’m ‘not supposed to use the talent as a removal service’ due to their delicate nature.”

Isak smiled sweetly at her.

“Well, I _am_ very delicate.”

“Not what you said last night,” Even muttered under his breath, returning Isak’s glare with a sunny smile.

“And if you ever want to hear me _not_ say it again, you better _not_ keep mentioning it in public,” Isak threatened.

“Oh, I definitely want to hear you not say it again,” Even said, inching closer to give Isak a quick kiss. “And again… and again… and again…” he continued smugly, emphasising every ‘again’ with another peck.

Isak tightened his arms around Even’s waist to pull him even closer, looking up at him with soft, half shut eyes.

“Mmm. Well, I could probably be convinced to not say it again tonight, actually,” he decided, contentedly going back to resting his chin on Even’s chest.

“ _Please_ tell me you didn’t just say that,” Mikaela cut in with a pained expression. “And _please_ , for the love of God, go be disgustingly in love somewhere else. Don’t you have a play to get ready for or something? And you...” she glared at Even, “you just grab that box over there and go make sure Isak gets backstage. Or go sit in the classroom already, whatever, just... go!”

“Fine, we can tell when we’re not wanted,” Even mock sulked at her as he walked over to collect the props on his way out. “Love you, Mikis.”

“Yeah, yeah, love you too. Now, please. _Go. Away._ ”

 

*****

 

Outside the door, Isak turned around and shot Even an embarrassed half smile.

”So… we’re really _that_ couple, huh?”

“The ridiculously adorable one that hooks up everywhere and dances to Gabrielle? Yes. We are.”

“Jeez, stop trying to make ‘dancing to Gabrielle’ happen, it’s not going to happen _._ ”

“Did you just _Gretchen_ me?”

“Well, you _were_ being annoying,” Isak shrugged. “Guess Jonas will be regretting his seal of approval soon enough.”

“Wait, I’ve been best friend approved? Really? Why is this the first I hear of it?”

“Meh, I wouldn’t get too attached to it, your Gabrielle obsession will have it instantly revoked the moment Jonas finds out.”

“What, I’m getting punished for my immaculate taste in music now?”

“You’re taste in music is shit, Even. Just like your taste in movies.”

Even took a step back, supporting the box with his knee so he could place a hand on his chest in feigned shock.

“Did _you_ just come for _my_ taste in movies?”

“You do remember the film you tried to show me last night, right? The _silent_ one? In _black and white?_ ”

“Metropolis is a cinematic masterpiece, ask anyone,” Even muttered darkly.

“I did, I asked Mags. He agreed. It’s boring _._ ”

“Just because something isn’t directed by Michael Fucking Bay doesn’t mean it’s boring, you uncouth heathen.”

Isak gave him an unimpressed look.

“Uncouth heathen? Really?” he asked with a quite impressive eye roll.

“I said what I said,” Even defended himself, leaning over towards Isak and silently demanding - and receiving - a kiss. As well as a bonus one.

”I _really_ have to go now, Even,” Isak whined against Even’s lips after the second kiss, but as his hand, firmly twisted in Even’s hair, didn’t seem like it was getting with the programme anytime soon, Even decided he could probably get away with at least two or three more kisses. Four if he was really lucky.

”But I’m going to miss you,” he pouted, his sad puppy dog eyes cranked up to stun.

”I’ll miss you m...”

”One day I’ll walk around a corner and _not_ find you two in a compromising situation and the shock will probably kill me.”

Isak groaned and dropped his forehead to Even’s chest.

“Hello, Even,” he mumbled indistinctly.

“Hello, Isak. Hello, Even. Nice to see you again, Even.”

“Nice to see you too, Even. It’s been much too long, Even.”

Isak groaned again.

“You saw him _last night_ , you ginormous giraffe,” he complained from somewhere inside Even’s - _his_ Even’s - denim jacket. “Also, you two are enjoying this whole twin name thing _way_ too much.”

“Nah, I’d say we enjoy it just the right amount. Don’t you think so too, Even?”

Isak resurfaced to shoot his Even a dark glare, resulting in his Even shrugging and smiling apologetically at Other Even.

“Sorry, I’ve apparently said too much already, so… you’re on your own there.”

“ _So_ whipped,” Other Even observed with an amused headshake. “Anyway, I take it Mikis threw you out again?”

“Third time this week,” Isak informed him proudly.

“Impressive,” Other Even acknowledged. “Although first play she produced for me, I was thrown out seven times in three days so you still have some way to go, young padawan.” Glancing at his watch, he grimaced. “Okay, I have to talk to Mikis about something. You, off to warm ups. And you…” he gave Even a nonplussed look, “I guess you already have your ticket for tonight’s show, so... how about you and your box go chill in the classroom already.”

Even nodded - of course he had a ticket for the show, what kind of amateurish stalker fanboy did Other Even take him for - and followed Isak towards the stairs while Other Even disappeared into the production room.

 

*****

 

“By the way, Even...?” Isak said halfway up the stairs, voice way too sweet for anything good to come from it. Even immediately prepared for the worst.

“Mmhm?”

“You remember how you said yesterday that you getting your cuddles was more important than me doing my laundry?”

Even only hummed in affirmation, needing all his oxygen to keep moving onwards and upwards. Jeez, you’d think three weeks of walking up and down those stairs would have done _something_ for his stamina?

“Right, so... let’s just say that tonight’s play might or might not be performed without underwear.”

Even’s eyes widened and focused in on the possibly underwear free area in question (well, he _might_ have been focusing on that area for the whole climb, but now he actually had an excuse to do it, okay?), his already strained relationship with breathing becoming an even bigger issue.

“That... was information I was better off not knowing, thanks.”

“Yeah, well, it might be true. It might not. You’ll just have to figure it out, won’t you?”

Reaching the top of the stairs, Isak turned around and gave Even an angelic smile and a quick kiss before sauntering off to prepare for the play - leaving Even to gape after him for longer than he was willing to admit before taking himself and the box with props off to the classroom.

 

*****

 

Even was sitting in his regular spot, scrolling through his phone and ruminating on Schrödinger's underwear, when the loudspeakers kicked off. Knowing the story by heart by now he didn’t even jump when the door to the classroom was yanked open and Alfred slouched in, giving Even a small nod of acknowledgement but too focused on the play to do more than walk over to his desk and drop into the chair. A few moments later the door opened again and Even lit up as Isak entered, smile warm, stroking Even’s back as he walked past him on the way to his assigned desk. Even turned around to look at him, but Isak had stepped back into character and was staring blankly in front of him as the audience started to crowd in, so Even turned back towards the whiteboard and returned his thoughts to more pressing matters, like Isak’s underwear. Well, at least nothing would stop him from determining their undetermined existence during the dance interlude, right?

“Hello, sweetheart.”

 _Right..._ Well, nothing apart from _that._

Even turned around at the familiar voice and stared dumbfounded into his mother’s eyes as she sat down next to him.

“You’ve been talking about this play so much so when your mother found two tickets on the internet we thought we’d come and see what’s so great about it,” his father supported, taking the seat next to her.

Right. Yes. This was… this was definitely not good. Even looked over at Isak in the hope of catching his eyes, but Isak was busy chatting to Camilla and thus remaining blissfully unaware of the catastrophe of epic magnitude that was about to hit. Well, good for Isak then.

Even hated his life.

 

*****

 

“Is that him?”

The whisper - if it could even be called that - was not on the lower end of the whisper scale, and Even continued to stare down at his desk. He loved his mother, he really did, but there were times when he could see the upside of matricide. Chancing a glance up at Isak he was met with a slightly puzzled smile and some surprisingly sexy dodgy dancing.

“He’s cute.”

Well, at least his mother had lowered her voice this time. Also…

“I know, now _stop talking!_ ” he hissed back, trying to ignore his parents synchronised sniggers.

Isak was now sliding his hand down his chest and further down… Even’s thoughts were immediately back on the underwear situation and, licking his lips, he followed the hand movement towards...

There was another snigger from his mother - louder this time - and Even quickly looked back down at his desk.

Yeah, he  _really_ hated his life.

 

*****

 

Standing around in the hallway waiting for Isak to get changed while being interrogated by his parents was not how Even had hoped to spend the evening, but here they were.

“So what does he do, KHIO? Westerdals? Bårdar?”

“Biophysics.”

“What? But… he’s so talented?”

“Well, he’s a man of many talents, and one of them happens to be biophysics.”

His mother nodded slowly, apparently still bemused that someone would prefer science to arts.

“I just got a text from Eskild, he’s staying with his latest grindr find tonight, so with Linn staying with her boyfriend that means we have the flat all to oursel... Hello?” Isak blinked and stopped talking, staring in confusion at two people he wasn’t expecting to see. Even straightened his shoulders and walked over and grabbed his hand - squeezing it a bit harder than necessary if Isak’s involuntary yelp was something to go from.

“Isak, these are my parents, Sigrid and Jan. Mum, dad, this is Isak.”

“I’m very happy to hear about the flat situation, Isak, having a flat to yourself on occasion is very important,” Sigrid said smoothly. “And you were absolutely fantastic in the play, by the way. You all were. And such an important subject too, I’m impressed by how well you were able to address the nuances of the situation.”

Even wanted to hug his clearly overwhelmed boyfriend whose cheeks were dark red from embarrassment as he peeked up at Sigrid while she continued to praise him, the performance, and the play, every so often prompting Even’s father to join in.

“So. Mum liked the play,” Even summarised when his mother finally ran out of breath, and Isak grinned gratefully up at him.

“Thank you, it’s a really interesting way to get people to talk about important issues, I think,” Isak said, still a bit self-conscious.

“The best plays usually are, and yours was _very_ good,” Even’s mum concurred. “Anyway, we thought we’d take you two out for dinner to celebrate before you go back to that empty flat for some extra studying.”

“Studying? Really, mum?”

“Please let me keep my ignorance about your sexlife, Even. The only reason you two are so happy about having the flat to yourselves tonight is so you can hold hands and play a nice game of Trivial Pursuit, right?”

”Yes. Right. Trivial Pursuit, definitely. I am the Trivial Pursuit master after all,” Isak agreed, having recovered at least a small part of his composure.

“Only because he cheats,” Even cut in, turning to his parents.

“I do _not_. Just because _you_ don’t know about the multiverse theory doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist, Even. Get over it.”

“Ah, yes. That’s why we got rid of our Trivial Pursuit, it all comes back to me now,” Even’s father muttered under his breath.

“Oh, don’t start, you’re just as bad as him, you know,” Sigrid pointed out, arms crossed.

(Trivial Pursuit? Apparently a very sore subject in the Bech Næsheim household.)

“Why would anyone know what some british royals got as a gift from whoever it was for whichever kid it was? It’s a stupid question. And you two just got questions about... bloody golf balls, or something.”

(Yes. _Very_ sore.)

“It was one question, dad. _One_ question. The rest of the questions you got were basically questions like ‘What name was Greta Gustafsson better known under’ and ‘Which state is known as the Aloha state’. And _you didn’t know the answers to those questions either._ ”

Ignoring the heated argument going on between father and son, Sigrid turned to Isak with an apologetic expression.

“Sorry about them, I really can’t take them anywhere. Anyway, Even tells me you’re studying biophysics?”

Isak shot Even a pleading look, but apparently being a sore loser took precedence over protecting one’s unprepared-to-meet-the-parents boyfriend.

“Um. Yeah, I’m in my second year right now?” Isak replied, sounding somewhat unsure about the fact.

“And do you enjoy it?”

Isak brightened up at that.

“Yeah, I love it, it’s really interesting! I was talking to one of my professors last week about what I want to specialise in - I mean, I won’t have to actually choose until I start my Masters, but… it’s worth thinking about already, you know? And I don’t really know if I want to continue on with a PhD afterwards, but I have been thinking about taking some medical physics’ courses just in case, because there are some really awesome cancer research projects going on, and…” he looked over at Sigrid and blushed, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to ramble, it’s just…”

“Oh, never apologise for being passionate about something, it’s a very admirable quality,” Sigrid reassured him. “And besides - if it all falls through, you’ll always have your dancing to fall back on,” she continued with a teasing wink.

“ _Mum?!_ ” Even squawked, scandalised enough to abandon the Trivial Pursuit argument his father was winning anyway.

“What? There is good money in dancing is all I’m saying,” Sigrid shrugged, expression virtuous.

Isak grinned, by now more or less relaxed thanks to Sigrid’s good natured ribbing - as well as her kind smile and familiar looking blue eyes.

”Yeah, exotic dancer has always been my plan B,” he deadpanned, making Even turn his scandalised eyes towards him instead.

“Going by my son’s open mouthed drooling during that part of the play, I’d say that would be a very lucrative business,” Sigrid agreed, smiling toothily at Even - who was still staring at Isak, apparently not yet over the ‘exotic dancer’ comment.

“Okay, that’s it. You two are a terrible influence on each other and are not allowed to speak to each other again. Ever,” Even informed them petulantly.

“Hey, I was just thinking - do you think we can trade this one for Isak?” Jan asked Sigrid, indicating his son. “Isak seems a lot less high maintenance after all, and it would be nice to have a doctor in the family.”

Even shot his father a betrayed look.

“Et tu, Brute?”

“Well, a doctor or an exotic dancer,” Jan corrected himself, ignoring Even. “I don’t think we‘ve ever had one of those. Would definitely liven up the family dinners over at aunt Tilde’s house.”

“Oh _God_ , yes,” Sigrid agreed enthusiastically, turning towards Isak. “How much to come and perform that dance for us on 17 May? Please?”

Isak was beginning to look slightly ill at ease again, so Even decided it was time to interfere.

“Don’t worry, they’ve planned to kill off great auntie Tilde for as long as I can remember and she’s still very much alive. And as bigoted as ever, for that matter,” he added with a grimace, recalling the previous month’s Easter dinner. And speaking of dinners, “Weren’t you going to feed us before we returned to Isak’s for our ‘homework’, by the way?”

“Yes. Food. Definitely. Do you like seafood, Isak? Or we could maybe cancel our reservation and go somewhere else?” Sigrid offered, sounding a little hesitant.

“No. Or, I mean, seafood is great,” Isak, whose idea of fine dining was the food trucks down at Aker Brygge, reassured her, “but... I really don’t want to intrude on your family time?”

“You’re definitely not intruding, Isak. We want you to come or we wouldn’t have asked.” Sigrid smirked as she linked arms with Isak and dragged him off towards the exit, “And besides, we need to hash out the details for that dance routine for aunt Tilde’s Constitution Day dinner.”

Even looked after them, his mum chatting to his boyfriend, his dad giving them an indulgent smile, and his boyfriend… well, his boyfriend still had a bit of a deer-in-headlights look going on, but he was genuinely giggling at something his mum had just said. And to be quite honest, most people  _did_ look a bit overwhelmed the first time they met his mother.

“Dinner waits for no one, Even,” his father called from the stairs.

Right. Dinner. With his boyfriend and his parents. And then back to his boyfriend’s empty flat for some… well, extracurricular studying, he supposed they could call it to save his mother’s peace of mind. Even jogged off towards the stairs, his smile positively radiating happiness.

Okay, so maybe he didn’t hate his life after all.


End file.
